Andrew Gene Collins

Andrew, we will all miss our little angels today and we give thanks for the time we had you all.  Send your mom and family hugs today.  Maybe you and Chance and all you're other new found angels will catch some football today from the best seat in the house.

 

Shelli - Mom to Angel Chance

There are times that none of this seems real to me; at others, the painful facts become a reality. I have become accustomed to this new life, the one without your presence, but I have not learned to accept it completely. I know that one day, there will be a grand reunion buddy and just knowing that you are safe and healthy should be enough for me. But Andrew, some days it just hits me like a ton of bricks and I just can't imagine how we've managed to move forward two years, nine and a half months without you. When we opened the pool last week-end, I remembered how many times I had to yell at you to NOT dive off of the deck from the house.  Then came the day that you actually believed that you were going to dive from our ROOF!  Thank God Kaitlyn "tattled" before you broke you neck!  The summer days and memories of you, your sisters and the many, many children who enjoyed the pool have come and gone, but those memories are still here and it just seems odd that you're not.

Being a family and burying a child, is a tough thing to do Andrew. It's as if part of this pie is gone...just gone, never to come back.  It makes me feel anxious each time I hear an ambulance or a siren. I live in fear that something could possibly happen to Amy or Kaitlyn, and that is more than my heart can take.  It's also tough on them because they know that I will call them instantly, just to make sure that the ambulance is not for them!

I'm sending you my eternal love buddy as we move towards the third anniversery of your move to Heaven.  I pray that you will support all of those who love you and miss you and protect those who are in need.

Loving yu always son...............

     

Well Buddy,

It's been two years and 7 months today, since we said "see ya later." Where has the time gone son and how is it that we have survived without all of the "excitement" that you brought into our lives?  You amazed me Andrew, the manner in which your heart spoke mountains about who you were internally and the way that you befriended virtually everyone that you met, but you also had that little "temper thing" going on. It's still here son, but it surfaces in the face of your beautiful little sister.  She's a doll, but when she blows, it's her brother's temper!

We all miss you Andrew; not one day passes that we don't think of you or hear a song that literally brings you back to us via the words, but most importantly, you are always a part of who we are.  There is something to be said for the phrase: "Gone, but not forgotton."  Actually, you are gone from sight, but never too far away to recreate a memory or laugh about something you said or did.

I was so blessed that God saw that having a biological son was not in the cards for me, yet he so blessed me with beautiful, healthy daughters.  You were my heart from the minute I met you...tiny little fellow with chubby hands! (who loved fried chicken, cucmbers,  tomatoes, apples and spaghetti (with NO meat!!)..go figure!!

I will visit you today just to reflect on the memories.  I know it's simply a place to go and sit silently at times and I believe that as we all stand at your grave, we know that you are looking down upon us asking us not to cry anymore.  That would be you my son...that would be you.

I love you with every ounce of my heart and sole..........

Loving and missing you always son.

Fly high and play ball in Heaven today my bonus boy and never, ever forget how much we love you.

Until the day we meet again.............hugs, kisses and prayers that you will continue to keep us strong.

 

I love you son..............Deb

Hey buddy,

Well, your little sister is driving solo now!  It came so quickly for me that I honestly had to force myself to realize that she was driving off alone.  I've wanted to protect her and prevent her from any type of harm, especially since you went to Heaven. I had to soul search a bit to convince myself that she deserves the same excitement and this new overwhelming sense of independence, that you and your sister Amy were allowed to enjoy. 

Please Andrew, watch over her, send her signs about the dangers of the highway and the "other person" who can also be the culprit in devasatating accidents.  She's a straight "A" student and deplores alcohol, cigaretts or drugs, so thus far...we're doing great.  I wish you could have seen her face when she got out of the car when she had completed the road test.  I yelled: "Hey Katie, are you a driving woman now????"  Her response was a cheshire grin from ear to ear. 

Wrap your Angel wings around her and keep her safe buddy.  Loving and missing you every day of my life.

Your other Momma,

Deb

PS, as you know, this is Molly and Kaitlyn.  Kaitlyn is on the right...your baby sister is growing up buddy. Kisses and hugs to Heaven.........

 

 

Good Morning Andrew,

I wanted to share a new memory with you and our friends who visit this site.  Your sister, Amy, became Mrs. Michael Armstrong on January 5th, 2008. The ceremony was beautiful and Amy looked like a princess.  Your younger sister, Kaitlyn, served as the Maid of Honor.  She too, looked so beautiful.

Michael ordered an extra boutenier for you and Amy had it with her as she walked down the isle.  You were their "Honorary Groomsman" buddy.  We know that you were there spiritually but oh how we all missed having you there physically.  What a handsome groosman you would have made.

I love you son, more now than ever. Everyday is a new experience and it seems to take us further and further away from the last time that we saw you on this earth; on the other hand, that must mean that we're moving closer towards a reunion.

Missing you and loving you for eternity buddy.........

Your other Momma

Wow Andrew, the summer is essentially over now.  Kaitlyn started the 11th grade today and Amy began her third year teaching  2nd grade.  Where does time go my buddy...where??? You would be beginning your Jr. year in College, had God not needed you more.  I wish you were still here, I wish that the girls still had their brother and that we had our son.  You have so many friends who continue to grieve Andrew, but time itself will determine when we can move on.

 

The attached picture was taken while Kaitlyn was on vacation with Molly and her family in Texas.  You remember Molly don't you?  She attended Northwood Academy with Kaitlyn and moved to Texas when they were in the 9th grade.  They are still such good friends.

 

Just look how grown up your baby sister is now.  She truly reminds me so much of you.  Her personality traits are so similar. 

 

Well buddy, go fly high with the other Angels and never, ever forget...I love you, I miss you and I thank God everyday for the son that came to me in a different way.

 

Love,

Deb

Debi, I was praying for some way to maybe brighten your day, I hope this helps at least a little bit.  The only thing that keeps me going is knowing that Jason is now reveling in God's Glory.  I know Andrew is hanging out with them too!! Praying for your family always!!

 

How could this be Andrew?  Is it truly possible that you left us two years ago? Has it been that long since we've seen you, since the two of us sat down for a heart to heart talk, or even an arguement? It still seems as if you're visiting someone or perhaps away at College and too tied up to come home.  My heart knows though, as do the hearts of so, so many others who knew and loved you. I know now that I should have taken more pictures and continued to use the camcorder, despite the protest I had grown accustomed to from the three of our children.  It's hard to watch them now. You were so alive, so into everything, so-so Andrew. You'll never know what it meant to me to have been given the opportunity to share your life. Thank you for laughing with me and crying with me, but most of all, for simply being the kind of fellow that you were.  Sometimes very unpredictable, but never, ever the type of guy to turn his back or his heart on those that he loved. It always amazed me after one of our long heart to heart discussions, how you had matured and become a young man, practically overnight.  You would have made a phenomenal husband and Daddy one day.  I'm sorry that we'll never share those memories.  Watching baseball has become a challenge for me.  I see your face or hear your voice and it traumatizes me, even if for only a moment. I know that I am so blessed to have Amy and Kaitlyn.  I feel as if they were robbed as well, but there is a reason for all things son. Before I close, just remember that time apart will never change what you mean to me, it will never take away memories of laughter and even tears, but above all, it has taught me to grasp onto each new day and be thankful for another opportunity to live, to love and to befriend those in need.  Never does a day pass though, that I don't think of you Andrew. Thank you again buddy, for being my bonus boy, for loving me and being unafraid to show it, but most of all, thanks for 15 1/2 years that no one can take away from me.  Always loving you, always missing you, and today, crying inwardly inside once more as we acknowledge your second anniversary in Heaven.   I LOVE YA BUDDY....DEB

 

 

Debi, here are the pictures again.  I'm so glad Gene likes them.  My little Miranda saw Andrew's picture tonight and said "Oh Mom, he's cute!"  Out of the mouths of babes.  :)

 

  

 

 

 

 

 

 

I'll say a special prayer on Sunday just for you.  I'm thinking of you as Mother's day approaches & praying for your family always.  

                                               With Christian Love,     Rose        

Hey buddy,

I'm spending a Sat afternoon looking through pictures and wondering why I never took more.  I remember how much you loved my sister Gayle.  The feeling was mutual.  She adored you from the minute she met you.  Through good times and bad, even some financially devastating hardships, she never forgot your birthday or Christmas Her neices and nephews always knew that she loved them so much.  Gayle was such a free spirit compared to me.  I'm much more reserved in so many ways, but I remember the day, as if it happened yesterday, that the 10 year age gap between the two of us, simply vanished.  Growing up as the youngest child, I couldn't imagine ever "catching up" with Gayle, who was almost 10 when I was born, and Terry, who was almost 8.  Then one day, my sister became my closest confidant, my best friend and the "other mother" to my children.  I needed her in a huge way when you died and even found myself calling her "disconnected" phone number.  Too much, too quick I guess. She would have been my rock buddy but I know now that she was waiting at Heaven's gates to hug you when you returned home.

I remember having to tell you and your sisters that Aunt Gayle had been diagnosed with a terminal and fatal disease.  We received the news on April 14th, 2004 and she passed away, with me sitting by her side, holding her hand and crying like a crazy woman, on Wednesday, June 18th, 2004.  Please never forget how much she loved you and the girls.  I never will; I miss her so much everyday that my heart sometimes wonders if I'll ever get over my losses.  The good of it all remains though...she has her arms around you and the two of you are happy.  I love you both and miss you with all of my heart Andrew.  Sing a song for Gayle; she loved your voice.  RIP my sister and son...always loving you both..I will never let time erase the memories that I was so blessed to have........YOU ARE BOTH THE WIND BENEATH MY WINGS...

Hey Buddy,

Look at your crazy big sis immediatley after jumping out of an airplane!  She certainly is one to try anything...at least once.  As a matter fact, she wants to jump again.  I remember having a conversation with you one day and you were waiting to tandum jump with your Aunt Tina's husband, Terry.  I wish you could have been there on the day that Amy and Michael jumped.  I experienced every emotion that a Mother might feel, yet never did I experience fear.  Somehow, I knew that you and Granddaddy and Aunt Gayle were looking after Amy.  Granddaddy and you were probably doing a chant of support; Aunt Gayle, on the other hand, was most certainly terrified.  I miss you all and love you more each day.  Love, kisses and special thoughts of all that we shared...my buddy, my son...my friend.  Deb

Debbie, Thank you for the words. Sometimes when people write mean things and hurt us, we think about deleting the site, but then, just as we are wondering what it is all for, someone who understands leaves a message and we are once again reminded of the care and understanding of others. I do truly love Jason with all my heart. He IS my best friend and it is hard dealing with all this pain. And even harder when others that dont care try to knock us down. Thank you for all your words and know that our angels are safely wrapped in God's arms. I know that just isnt enough to get us through sometimes but its all we've got to hold on too. And all the wonderful memories. You have great memories and are blessed to have had them with Andrew, as I am also with Jason.

I found this picture today and the flood gates opened once more!  Andrew was 51/2 years old and Kaitlyn was 11 months old.  (I know..big girl, huh?)  Santa brought Andrew the jeep the Chrismas prior to this picture being taken.  Initially, Kaitlyn was content to sit beside her brother, his arm around her little shoulder, and they rode, and rode AND RODE!  On this particular day, Kaitlyn decided that it was time for her to get behind the wheel.  Big brother is making an earnest effort to convince her to 'MOVE!"  She was not willing to budge.  Eventually, it got ugly and I had to intervene, but this picture is priceless!  Thanks for another "grab my heart strings" memory buddy.  Always loving and missing you.

Debi....the luckiest woman in the world to have been blessed with a step-son, who became the only boy that I would ever have and unfortunately, the son that I had to let go of, far too soon!  You are so loved, so missed and such an important part of the many lives that you left behind. I still cry when I look at pictures and the memory comes right back to me as if it happened yesterday.  Kisses and hugs to Heaven buddy........always loving you...Deb

Hey Buddy,

I found this on another memorial site and wanted to share it...it so tells the story of grief.  Always loving you, always missing you and forever and ever refusing to forget that you were here!

Loving you always,

Debi (your other Momma)

 

Don't ask me if I AM over it yet.  I'll never be over it.  A part of me died when Andrew died!  Don't tell me that he is in a better place.  He is not here where he belongs.

Don't say "at least he is not suffering."  I haven't come to terms with why he suffered at all.

Don't tell me "at least I have other children."  Which of your children would you have sacrificed?

Don't ask me if I feel better.  Bereavement isn't a condition that clears up.

Don't tell me that "at least we had Andrew for 18 years."  What year would you choose for one of your children to die?

Don't tell me "God never gives us more than we can bear."  Right now, I don't feel we can handle anything else either.

Don't avoid me.  I don't have a contagious disease, just unbearable pain.

Don't tell me that you know how I feel, unless you have lost a child.  No other loss can compare to losing a child.  It's not the natural order of things.

Don't take my anger personally.  I don't know who I am angry at or why and I lash out at those closest to me at times.

 

Don't whisper behind me when I enter a room.  I am in pain, but I am not deaf.

Don't stop calling me after the initial loss.  Grief does not stop there and I need to know that others are thinking of our family.

Don't be offended when I don't return calls right away.  I take each moment as it comes and some are worse than others.

Don't tell me to "get on with my life."  We each grieve differently and in our own time frame.  Grief can not be governed by any clock or calendar.

 

Do say you are sorry.  We're sorry, too, and you saying that you share our sorrow is far better than saying those tired cliches you don't really mean anyway.

Just say you're sorry.

Do put your arms around me and hold me.  I need you strength to get through each day.

Do say you remember Andrew. Memories are all I have left and I cherish them.

Do let me talk about Andrew.  He lived and still lives on in my heart, forever.

Do mention Andrew's name. It will not make me sad or hurt my feelings.

Do let me cry.  Crying is an important part of the grief process.  Cry with us if you want to.

Do remember us on special dates.  Andrew's birthday, date of death and holidays are a very difficult time to be without a child.

Do show our family that you care.  Sometimes we forget to do that in our own pain.

DO BE THANKFUL FOR YOUR CHILDREN.  NOTHING HURTS US WORSE THAN SEEING OTHER PEOPLE IN PAIN.

 

AUTHOR: UNKNOWN

This is for you Andrew. You guys are in our prayers. Dont give up on things, you will see Andrew again. He is waiting (more patiently than you, im guessing) to see you all again. John and Brenda

We just know Jason and Andrew are up in Heaven together. Just thought they would like another player. Guys play together way beyond the clouds. Rest in peace!!!

I know this is a day late, but Happy Easter anyway. I put this picture on here. It is John and his brother Jason together. It comforts us to see pictures of them together. Happy Easter

A candle lit for you Andrew. This is not a memory but we didnt know where else to put it. So, here's you a great big candle so you and your family can find your way to each other forever. Praying for you. John and Brenda Murray    

Well Andrew, your older sister and her boyfriend jumped out of a perfectly good airplane yesterday.  I thought I would be an absolute wreck but in actuality, it was exciting!  Yesterday was the first anniversary of my Daddy's death...he took your hand and went to Heaven on March 30th, 2006.  As you might remember, Grand-Daddy was a life long military man, a retired Major and a member of the 82nd airborne.  He loved to jump!  I think Amy jumped for him and she was so prescious when she landed. 

 

Michael jumped too and he isn't too fond of heights. Both of them did a great job. Now your younger sister wants to tandem jump for her 16th birthday. We'll see!

 

Well, send us love and kisses son.  We miss you more every day.  Fly high sweet Angel!

 

Deb